First Day At Home
It’s been a while since I’ve gotten Covid. I think it’s from going to pottery this past week. Strange because the studio is really big, and I hardly talked to anyone. If you hung out with me this week, I am terribly sorry.
The feeling of having Covid is always morbid to me. Morbid because it was ultimately what was inked on my parents’ death certificates. Morbid because the symptoms then and now are so different. It’s less of an issue these days. The world had a freakout when it first came out. Now we pass it off as a regular cold (if it’s bad, the flu).
I can’t help but think about it sometimes. It’s hurt so many people in my life. But it’s not like I can sit here and personify it either. It’s just the way God intended it to be. And I have to remember that.
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What was supposed to be a day in LA turned out to be a surprisingly productive day at home. I think this is probably my first (or second?) time at home all day by myself. Other days, I’ll try to keep busy with people or hobbies. In a way it feels like God is telling me to sit down and take a rest. I also don’t want to make up what God may or may not be telling me…so I guess it’s just a good day to be home.
I guess I have a lot to write about. I don’t want to treat this blog as my diary, but I’ll have to admit that after I started to pay for this domain, I haven't visited writing on physical paper.
I’ve been thinking a lot about when my time will come to have a boyfriend - if I’ll get another shot at one (or even a nice one). I don’t think I really need to worry about it, but being home all day makes me feel like it’d be nice to have one. At the same time, my schedule would be different and priorities would change. My current sched is very tailored to my free hobby/study/work lifestyle. Do I want to give that up?
There’s a certain person that’s been on my mind. And my guess is that he’s on a lot of girls’ minds. I think one of my friends hates the idea of him, and one of my other friends actually wants him. I wonder if he’ll become a real Christian. If he can ever snap out of his hippy, too-cool-for-you mindset. So I asked one of his friends if he thinks this person would snap out of said mindset. The answer was hopeful, but hopeless at the same time. I guess sometimes, you have to just give things up in life. If it’s not meant to be, it’s just not. Another person said to me that, “playing the long game works.” Well, I’m not here to play the longest game, but it’ll be interesting to see how things play out. Who knows? Maybe in the next three months, I’ll see that he’s proposed to a girl who probably has him in his mind this very second….(for clarification, not me). (B, if you’re reading this, you cannot judge me because this is my blog, dammit!).
Today, I cooked, cleaned, and put up a new shelf in my living room. I thought I was going to finish my book today. My inability to read is amazing. How does one fall asleep immediately after reading one word? My friend, B (who hates the idea of that certain person that’s been on my mind), brought a target bag with vitamins, chocolate strawberries, and fruit. I love my family! I love OC. It’s been the best decision I’ve made in a while. And I know this one’s good because I know I trusted Christ through it. I don’t remember the last time I’ve made a good decision, which is sad but helps me to see that I have so much to be grateful for now.
